Twisted Oak - Calaveras County California

Events, Cancellations & Refunds

We have several dinners and events a year, and these events are typically catered by outside vendors. These vendors require us to pay them in advance for a committed number of people. (Typically, a number of people who should be committed, but I digress.)

So, after a certain date we will have paid for you, and we can't get that money back, so we're afraid neither can you. But if we are able to find someone to take your place we will happily refund your money! (It's not like we're buttheads about it...)

Also, you know we are freaks for having a good time, but believe it or not even freaks have limits. If you are asked to leave due to inappropriate behavior you will not receive a refund. Hint: come sober, leave happy and safe.

Finally, if we have to postpone or cancel an event for any reason, you will of course be entitled to a full refund.

Policies and *%#&@!

Privacy: Twisted Oak Winery will never ever EVER sell or give away our mailing list. We would rather be dragged through the jungle by an enormous incontinent weasel than divulge these secrets. So don’t ask! And, if you ever want off of our mailing list, please contact us by mail, phone, internet, or carrier iguana and we’ll make sure it is like you never existed. So to speak. But we’ll be sad.

Confidentiality: We at Twisted Oak Winery would rather be boiled in acid than divulge the personal information you were kind enough to give us when you made your order and/or joined the Twisted Few. Well, OK, if an angry mob shows up with a vat of boiling acid we're giving up the goods. But then we're calling the cops. We promise!

Trademark: "Twisted Oak", "Are You Twisted?", "*%#&@! Yeah!", "Wine Rack", "Don't Fear the Pink!", "Go Ahead, Twist My Oak!" "Don't Spit the Good *%#&@!", "Twisted in Twaining", "Wine Wack in Twaining" , "Snaggle My Puss", "Take Your Rubber Chicken to Work Week", "The Spaniard", "Pig Stai", "Murgatroyd", "Torcido", "Parcel 17", "Ruben's Blend", and "*%#&@!" are trademarks of Twisted Oak Winery, LLC. Yes, all of them.

Copyright: All content on this web site is copyrighted by Twisted Oak Winery, LLC. We take this copyright stuff seriously because we think we have some pretty cool *%#&@! here and we don't want it being used for nefarious purposes. Back off Doctor Klang!

Nearly all of the photos on this site were taken by El Jefe, our Fearless Leader. If you want to use any of them, please just ask. He's cool if you're cool.

Drinking Age

Dude. We know it sucks, but if you are under 21 we just can't sell you wine right now.

While we might be tempted to be flattered that you chose Twisted Oak wines for your first foray into your blossoming adulthood, you're going to need to make that choice after you have reached your 21st birthday.

The good news is that you have a whole lifetime of semi-responsible choices to make when you reach your 21st birthday, but you will never ever again be under 21.

So, go have a Coke or a Red Bull or something and enjoy the tattered remnants of your misspent youth while it lasts. We'll be here when it's time!